On Saturday, the water in the rooftop pool at the hotel in Barbados was cold. I took a quick dip anyway, knowing it would be preferable to the cold air that would greet me hours later when we arrived home.
In January, we made the decision to book a little chemomoon, after the chemo and before the scan. We had JetBlue credit that was going to expire, since we had to cancel a trip to California last year so we could stay home and take care of our dying kitten, Charlotte. The chemo side effects were a little rough towards the end of the last two rounds, and with my mysterious nerve pain and peripheral neuropathy, I wondered if it was a good idea to go the day after the final chemo day. I had some leg and arm numbness and a few lingering side effects, and one night I woke up with my heart racing a bit, but mostly I was OK. It was a much-needed respite from chemo and medical stuff.
Yesterday, I had chills and was really tired so I went to the urgent care near the office. I had 103-degree fever and the flu test came back negative. I knew I’d have to call MSKCC and what they would say: I would have to come in to the urgent care. By the time I arrived uptown my fever was gone. I was given another nasal swab to test for viruses, as well as a blood test. My blood came back normal, and there were no viruses detected. I fell asleep in the waiting room and while I was given some fluids and fell into a deep sleep when I returned home after midnight. This morning, I felt a little off and so tired, so I worked from home. I had a 101-degree fever in the morning and a 102-degree fever this evening.
Tomorrow I have my follow-up scan after the chemo. I’m really worried that the chemo didn’t work, since I’m feeling so bad. I’ve felt pretty bad since October. I’ve been fairly pessimistic since it always seems like there’s bad news, followed by more bad news. I would like a little cancer break, but it probably isn’t in the cards. I will find out more tomorrow. In the meantime, here are some photos of my trip to Barbados.